Your Reason for Being
Do you know what you want? What you really want?
Do you have a vision, a dream, a purpose for your life?
Do you know your Reason for Being?
Or, do you mostly go through every day putting one foot in front of the other, head down, doing what needs to be done? Do you spend 90% of your day and too much of your energy reacting to what is to be done next? Every single woman I work with deals with this!
We feel as if there is so much to do – with so little time and too few resources to do it.
The questions we need to ask ourselves include:
What is it that we are spending so much time doing?
Why are we doing the things we are and…
How are we being while we are doing whatever it is that we’re doing?
Are we doing the things that will make us happier, healthier and more fulfilled, the things that we really want, or are we simply doing what shows up next on the list?
Loretta LaRoche tells a great joke about seeing a woman’s tombstone that read “Got it all done. Died anyway.” Think about it. Are you chasing that never-ending to-do list? Do you seem to be working all the time yet getting nowhere – certainly not happier, healthier, and more fulfilled?
I had a client tell me a couple of weeks ago that she couldn’t do one more thing, not even self-care. She couldn’t even find the time to cash in a gift card for a massage. And heaven help anyone who asked her to move forward, or to learn something, much less to grow…I completely understood.
We have just completed a massive move. For me, it was a HUGE project. Some days, the best I could do was make a list, put my head down, keep moving, trying to pace myself and remembering to breathe. Sometimes this is a necessary strategy, but one thing I know for sure: This is not how I want to be living my life, daily, always. Being a workhorse is not my Reason for Being.
The problem happens when this way of being becomes a lifestyle! And it does. If this is your daily routine, odds are, you are lost. You may be spending all of your energy being really busy, reacting to everything in your path and doing what everyone else wants you to do because you don’t know what you really want. You don’t have a mission. You don’t have your own vision or direction. Therefore, you end up flapping in the external winds of the world. You chase that never-ending to-do list hoping that maybe magically and mysteriously it will get you what you want. That’s scary and tiresome.
Learn to ask yourself daily, What do I really want? And don’t make it another to-do list. Make it a to-BE list – a list of how you intend to be today. Every morning, stop and ask yourself (preferably in your beautiful personal journal), “What really matters to me today? What is important to me in my life? What is my Reason for Being today?”
Then, listen deeply. Pay attention to your answers and use this information to guide you during the day. Make choices for your life based on what’s important to you rather than reacting to all that gets thrown in your path or doing what you’ve always done or what other’s want you to do. Doing this daily practice will help you stay focused and keep you from chasing your (or someone else’s) tail.
This doesn’t mean that sometimes we still don’t have to put our heads down and work hard to get something, but make sure you are doing it for a reason – for the purpose of living your one true life.
Our difficult move that required such grinding hard work was ironically for the ultimate purpose of simplifying our lives and making our lives easier. Smaller house, less stuff, not such a long to-do list. More time to be relaxed, still, and mindful. Now that’s my Reason for Being.
What do you really want?
Why are you doing the things you do?
How do you want to be?
What might be your
Reason for Being?
Please come and join us in October for the next Women’s Weekend Retreat. This will be a perfect time for stopping to reflect on where you are and where you want to go next in your life. The cool fall weather, along with the natural beauty of Palm Key Nature Retreat Center, will work its magic on us all as we Consider the Possibilities for our Lives… Early Registration available until Sept. 15th. CLICK HERE for more info!
2 Responses to “Your Reason for Being”
As always, your blog is right on time…As I reached for a note pad to jot down the four questions, the imprint on that pad read, “I used to have a handle on things, but it broke.” So true, as I always try and keep my life in order, as the line between order and chaos is very thin. As a single woman, if I don’t do “it”, “it” does not happen…a very dangerous place to be. Therefore, I shall contemplate your four questions and see if I can make headway as I am not living my true life and I have known this for years. Thanks for being there. D.
You offer many soul searching questions. In knowing ourselves, we find where we are supposed to be.
I feel we have many purposes throughout our lifetimes and lives entertwine for specific reasons though sometimes we don’t know until much later.
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